How to deal with getting nervous.

 

Before a performance, do you feel like your nerves get the better of you?

 

Like you can’t focus on what you want to focus on (ahem, joy and love for performing) because you are consumed with self doubt, anxiety, and sweaty palms?

 

Yep! I can soooo relate! 

 

I hate it when I can’t control my breathing and my sound because everything feels out of whack, and well, just out of control. 

 

You work hard to prepare and then you feel like your efforts are foiled because your body betrays you and you can’t enjoy the thing you’re really good at!

 

Listen, I understand.

 

People are always so surprised when they hear I suffer from performance anxiety.

 

I got pretty good along the way from hiding it and keeping it under control.

 

But I wanted to do better than just hide it.

 

How about learn how to keep it under control AND enjoy this experience of singing in front of others.

 

It’s possible!!

 

I've amassed tools to use before a performance from my years of dealing with this.

 

Yes, these are tools to help you learn how to cope with nervous energy so it doesn’t get the better of you. 

 

And then get you to the point where you can enjoy it, have fun and experience JOY while doing your thing.

 

Let's take a look!

 

 

# 1 IDENTIFY YOUR SYMPTOMS

 

Right before you are about to perform you might experience some stuff.

Symptoms like shallow breathing, tension in the body and face, “butterflies” in the stomach, heightened energy (not necessarily a bad thing!), tightened throat making speaking seem harder, hand tremors as well as in the legs, and the inability to focus.

 

 

The first thing to do when you are experiencing performance anxiety is to locate the sensations in your body. 

 

Where is it residing exactly? What does it feel like?

 

For example:

-tornado in my heart

-butterflies in my stomach

-feels cold

-breathing becomes shallow

-inability to breathe

-energy feels wild and out of control

 

Why do this? When you start to get really nervous, it can feel like your body has been hijacked by some unknown force.

 

It feels out of control, and you can feel in the dark about it which adds to the anxiety.

 

Hopefully, when it starts to happen, rather than feel completely out of control, by naming what’s happening, by naming the physical symptoms, we gain a bit of awareness and feel a little more ‘in the know.’ 

 

By connecting with our bodies, rather than avoiding it or trying to escape it, it loses a little bit of power over us. 

 

When we are trying to fight something that we are feeling, it makes it bigger. 

 

Being able to notice what is happening is very powerful.

 

 

#2. PREPARATION

 

This is in my book is #1. 

 

Doing something over and over and over and over and over helps to get the “performance” into your body and helps you to feel like there is some measure of control. 

 

Muscle memory. 

 

Repetition gives you power.

 

Tip: Just check in with your energy when you are practicing. Is fear motivating you? Is the energy feeling negative? If so try to shift the energy by focusing on a more positive motivation behind your practice session.

 

#3. JOURNALING

 

Spend some time writing down your greatest fears. 

 

There can be a loop that goes round and round in our heads of all the things that could go wrong and all the things we are most deeply afraid of. 

 

Writing it all down can help to close that “fear app” in your brain so you can focus on what you need to be focusing on, rather than the fear-based voice.

 


#4. MEDITATING

 

(My other favorite.) Sit quietly right before your performance and connect to your breath. 

 

BREATHE DEEPLY.

 

Focus on your breath.

 

Don’t underestimate the power of simply breathing deeply right before your performance. 

 

It’s the first thing to go.

 

If you can be totally with your breath as you begin, you are going to feel far more centered.

 

#5. PHYSICAL EXERCISE

 

Exercise of some kind right before might be helpful. 

 

Running up and down stairs or jumping jacks to shake things up.

 

#6. GET INTO CHARACTER.

 

This is something tangible to focus on, rather than yourself. 

 

You can be someone else.

 

Most importantly, you are also connecting to your deeper purpose here and that is to SERVE THE MUSIC AND THE TEXT. 

 

Be the conduit through which the creative gremlins can flow through.

 


#7. POWER POSE

 

Change your body stance. 

 

Pick a powerful pose such as standing with arms stretched up and out, or open chest with arms on hips, like Wonder Woman. 

 

You may not be able to change your brain in this moment by thinking it away, but maybe by changing your posture, it will shift something.

 

#8. TALK TO YOURSELF

 

Literally have a conversation with yourself. 

 

Be your best friend. 

 

Ask: “[insert your name], what’s wrong?”

 

Answer: All the things you are feeling. All the fears.

Ie: “I feel nervous, I feel upset, I’m scared I’m going to really screw this up and make a fool of myself. I’m scared I won’t live up to my potential. I’m scared people will laugh or walk away thinking I SUCK.”

 

Then validate those feelings. 

 

“I see you feel scared. I see you are shaking in your boots. I see you are worried about what other people will think. What’s the deeper truth?”

 

Answer: The deeper truth is I’m here to shine my light and that has nothing to do with anyone else. 

 

Or I’m here to serve the text and it has nothing to do with me personally.

 

Or whatever it is for you!

(Tip: Maybe do this one in the privacy of your own home or quietly in the public restroom. :))

 


#9. GET CLEAR ON YOUR GOAL

 

Often we go into situations like this thinking (without realizing) that the goal is to impress or to be liked. 

 

Get clear on your goal. 

 

Maybe your goal is to be yourself or to allow the work you’ve done up until now to support you and allow your true self to shine through.

 

Maybe the goal is to just do it for yourself, not anybody else.

 

Maybe it’s simply to have fun. :)

 

Getting clear on your goal can be useful, insightful and EMPOWERING.

 


#10. VISUALIZATION

 

Envision it exactly how you want it to go. 

 

This is something I have used myself A LOT. Imagine the “performance” from start to finish exactly the way you want it to go. 

 

Imagine how you desire to feel: relaxed, confidant, in the flow, at ease, powerful. 

 

Go through the whole performance with every detail in mind, those moments that seem scary or iffy going exactly the way you want them to go. 

 

Focus on the desired feeling.

 


#11. BE THE HOST

 

I love this one so much, from the great cellist, Yo-Yo Ma.

 

When you are on stage or in front of a group, imagine you are the host, and the audience members are your guests. 

 

You are the host of a wonderful party. 

 

And when you are the host of a party there is an unsaid agreement at such an event. Everyone is there to have a good time.

 

If something bad happens on stage ( Think, Julia Child, “Oh, the chicken’s fallen on the floor! Yes. Oh, well pick it up and put it right back.” ), they’re not going to let that moment spoil their evening. Everybody’s with you. They’re not here to watch bad things happen. They’re here to see the things you practiced for.

 

Yo-Yo-Ma said, “The greater purpose is that we’re communing together and we want this moment to be really special for all of us. Because otherwise, why bother to have come at all? So it’s not about how many people are in the hall. It’s not about proving anything. It’s about sharing something.”

 

It’s not about proving anything. It’s about sharing something.

 


#12. JUST DO IT

 

We tell ourselves and we tell other people that singing in front of people is really scary, and should be avoided. 

 

Run towards the danger!

 

“When we say that to ourselves repeatedly, we engage our brain in a process called negative reinforcement,” says Anwesha Banerjee, a neuroscientist at the Emory School of Medicine in Atlanta. 

 

“Negative reinforcement is defined as strengthening of a behavior response by avoiding a negative stimulus. Of course, in this case, the behavior response that we are strengthening is our fear response, and the negative stimulus is getting up on the stage.”

 

The answer, according to Banerjee, is to acclimate ourselves to the fear. 

 

“The only way to thwart negative reinforcement is to actually be in the presence of the stimuli as much as we can,” suggests Banerjee. “ As the famous saying goes, you’ve got to get back on the horse that threw you.”

 

It should be noted, getting nervous does have its advantages— it gives you an edge, that you might not have if you’re totally chill and relaxed!

 

The key here is to see what works for you. Trial and error. Be in the moment and respond with what you need. Maybe somedays you need to get in character or another day do a power pose. Only YOU know.

 

Can you relate? Or do you have other ideas that you use that I haven’t listed? Please, send me message on instagram or through my contact page! I'd love to hear from you!

 

P.S.

You might want to jump on the chance to join the waitlist for my new course, Joyful Singing, which will be launching January 13th! 

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